Fun ganker stories and messages!

Share your funny ganker stories and messages here!
(No gamertags or psn id's)
And note that I use divine blessings for gankers and backstabbers.
I'll start with a massive wall of text.

Invading in the rage inducing forest as usual and I end up finding three cookie cutter gankers. I wasn't having any of that so I promptly jumped off the nearest ledge. The next two invasions I get TWoP'd and stun locked. My forth invasion, I see their names in the recent players list(useful), so I came up with a dastardly plan; run. I spawned near the entrance and dashed to the right until I jumped off of a cliff. Well this cliff was the one to the Darkroot Basin. I healed with a divine blessing and grabbed my claymore and waited. If they had jumped(which they didn't sadly), my backstab would kill each of them. Eventually I walked off down to my new ally, the hydra and safely sent a message. "Have fun with no invaders. ;]" They would have to jump to certain death or kill off a phantom and gank with 2v1s. The host instead disconnects. I had won.
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What started out as a duel ended with me laughing hysterically. The host bows, I bow, and the duel starts. About a fifth of my health was gone and about half of his. Suddenly he pivot stabs me(I didn't see it coming as I thought it was a duel)and fails at chaining me. I use one divine blessing as this is no longer a duel. He stops and just spams the look skyward gesture. I poke him, kick him, channeler dance in front of him, but he keeps using it so I just kill him. After a impossibly boring barrage of poorly spelled hatemail and kindly replying to each of them(being kind is the new rude apparently) I decided it was time for this to end. The following was my message.
"Ifrit has yet to receive a reply! Will ---- ever send a message? Will Iffy ever convince ---- that he is not a ******? And what of the divine blessings he had "spammed"? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DARK SOULS HATEMAIL!!!!!" To top it off I sent a friend request to him. Unsurprisingly, he declined...

A duel doesn't mean no backstab territory. You shouldn't have eaten that divine blessing. I get roll backstabbed all the time, and even though my anger is tremendous, I know I can't heal during a duel. No healing always come first in a duel.

I'm a Darkmoon Blade using my newest character who was made to bother people rather than to win.
I invade a gentleman via my Darkmoon ring, intending on performing my usual throw Prism Stones everywhere, and then roll into him with thorn armor till death thing, when I spy that he has a sunbro with him.
Naturally, I did what any self-respecting person whose character is meant to annoy rather than to terrorize and moved the lever controlling the elevator in Anor Londo before they could get to me as an active protest against ganking.

While I was hanging out on the elevator platform, I threw prism stones everywhere to pretty up my new home, until they found a new lever to pull me back up to them. I immediately ran back up and pulled the lever again, and ran down the stairs into the lobby before the entrance to Gwyn's Tomb.

When they caught up to me, I actually managed to do some damage with my lightning Bonwheel Shield before things started heading to backstab city.

Inevitably beaten and near-ganked, I ran back up the stairs, leaving a trail of poison and toxic clouds in my wake; before I jumped off the nearest ledge, robbing them of the satisfaction of finally ganking the jerk that led them that merry chase.

One of the few Silly Buggers of the Dark Souls world takes an active stance against gankers, and so should you!

WyrmHero wrote:A duel doesn't mean no backstab territory.

I agree, I'm fine with backstabbing as long as they're not fishing or trying to get an instant kill with it.(ex.Large club with DMB and they aren't even attempting to attack)
He crossed the line at trying to chain me.

Edit: Baiulus, that is amazing and I love you for using that build.

Indeed, chain bs is the worst **** ever made. I always try to use an R2 after a wake up, but some guys just hit R1 randomly so must of the time chain bs doesn't occur. If it occurs you are free to heal if they miss, because that would be rule #2 of honorable dueling. I only use chain BS for those who heal.

Some might call this build ineffective, and more trouble than it's worth; and I'd probably agree with them.
But with the right amount of creativity, it can be horrendously enjoyable to play with.

Also: I don't much like Gravios. | : <

IceIfrit666 wrote:

WyrmHero wrote:A duel doesn't mean no backstab territory.

I agree, I'm fine with backstabbing as long as they're not fishing or trying to get an instant kill with it.(ex.Large club with DMB and they aren't even attempting to attack)
He crossed the line at trying to chain me.

Edit: Baiulus, that is amazing and I love you for using that build.

well said. i actually had an invader trying to take me out spamming the r2 attack from the dragon weapon with the straight-line aoe attack. i tried to attack him from the side to avoid the r2 and accidentally bs'd him. he msg'd me stating that bs's are for noobs. this after he was spamming an aoe attack and healed.

Baiulus wrote: Also: I don't much like Gravios. | : <

How couldn't you like gravios? They're huge, impossible to hit without bouncing off of them, make you fall asleep, and the black ones spam the sweeping fire beam! Whats not to like?

And I know Baiulus, djgq42, and I aren't the only ones with these stories.

IceIfrit666 wrote:

Baiulus wrote: Also: I don't much like Gravios. | : <

How couldn't you like gravios? They're huge, impossible to hit without bouncing off of them, make you fall asleep, and the black ones spam the sweeping fire beam! Whats not to like?

And I know Baiulus, djgq42, and I aren't the only ones with these stories.

My Death Stench's ESP begs to differ about the bouncing off, but the rest hurts me.

I suppose it isn't as bad as Narcuga or Yian Kutku; but it's still pretty bad.

And back to the topic, I don't really think I have anymore, really. I just finished my Silly Bugger build yesterday, and the one I told earlier happened just last night.

Don't kill yourself to spare them the satisfaction of ganking you, use the Black Crystal

No time, they were right on my tail.

I could have done it when I was safely on the elevator at the beginning, but that wouldn't have made as large of an impression.

Yesterday i was invading anor londo (so surprising i got ganked :suspect: ) with a SL 60 build (0 poise no shield) and was happily looking for the host when i finally found him in the giant bs stairs, well he was with 2 phanton helping and both where using chaos pyromancies, i couldnt dodge properly in that narrow place so i died pretty fast ... i dont know why i keep invading in annor londo

Since we have a lot of new members and not everyone is in love with the forest I'll share one of my favorites.....

I spawned into the usual.....host with a Sun Bro. I noticed they hadn't deforested yet so I chuckle a little inside like I always do. I show myself and let them start giving chase. I lock on to the phantom and backpedal, zigzagging from near the stairs to all the way to the cliffs about. The phantom is right near me the whole time with the host trailing a bit. The phantom is a little aggressive thinking he has help. IN reality the host is surrounded by all the trees I just made them aggro. After a few test attacks he realizes he's alone. Long story short I take out the phantom and chase the host around a bit. All the while he's being chased and harassed by a living forest. Eventually he is literally stuck in a circle of trees. Can't move.....





I've also had a host chase me (phantom tied up with another Hunter) and walked into the chasm to get to the bridge. He followed trying to do the falling attack on me. I had rolled away already. I only intended to funnel him into a hallway style fight. Bonus points when the trees dropped down. One in front. One in back. My scythe could still reach him too.......

Oh trees, you so silly.
The first has happened to me when I used to host...

Have a good one from the kiln the other night. I call it - 'The SLB'n douchwraiths.'

Ahh, where to start. So I was hosting in the kiln the other night I summon a guy using RSS, we start fighting, rolling around etc. Next thing a Darkwraith invades, we're down the steps, and I'm hoping the guy that just invaded has the courtesy to wait. But no, I hear him buff his weapon, so I BS the first guy, and turn my attention to the wraith behind me. He comes running at me with his SLB Zweihander, full giants and all.

Meanwhile the other guy runs off and casts heal. It gets worse, HE then comes back with SLB on his Claymore. So whilst I fended off the Zwei guy, the other dude trys to run in and hit me, I roll outta the way and he ends up hitting zwei dude, and zwei dude returns the favour, i got caught in the crossfire and have about 300hp left. I run down the hill, first one comes running at me... snap, backstab, bye bye. The other guy does the exact same thing, snap, backstab bye bye to him, too.

I felt like a boss, hehe. I got a bit lucky, I'll admit but damn did it feel satisfying, cleaning those two up. Anyway just thought I'd share.