Thread of lame jokes.

    Share
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:55 am

    NaBrO - ooooh another chemistry joke! I am rolling these in


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:56 am

    A horse walks into a bar, the barman asks him what drink he would like, he doesnt reply - because he's a horse! Anti-jokes


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:57 am

    A man was walking his dog through the graveyard when he saw another man crouching behind a gravestone.

    "Morning!" he said.

    The other man replies, "No, just having a crap."


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:58 am

    A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.

    Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."

    "Curious about sex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her F**king appendix out!"


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    Tolvo
    Town Crier
    Town Crier

    Posts : 13287
    Reputation : 542
    Join date : 2012-02-01
    Age : 25
    Location : The Forest, Illinois

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Tolvo on Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:59 am

    I hope mine wasn't too dark, I forgot to turn off my imagination when typing that. :oops:
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:00 am

    Rainwater appears to be leaking through the roof of my aviary.

    It's really getting on my tits


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:00 am

    haha it was fine Tolvo, now back to me posting many crap jokes


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:01 am

    Right, Right Doctor who Joke...

    "Now then" said the Doctor, "if you can remove your trousers and slip your underwear off for me... Thank you. And jump lightly on the spot.. good, good. Nice swing. Now if you can bend over this desk.. place your hands on top. Excellent. Hold still please, you will feel a little cold gel on your anus."

    "Doctor?"

    "Hmm?"

    "Do you do this to all your assistants when they first visit the Tardis?"


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    Digitalyzed
    Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Posts : 1136
    Reputation : 8
    Join date : 2012-04-02
    Age : 24

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Digitalyzed on Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:11 am

    Okay okay, Chemistry time.

    A man walks into a bar with his friend. He says to the barman "I'll have some H2O". His friend then says "And I'll have some H2O too". They drank their drinks and his friend died.

    Get it?


    Next: Want to hear a joke about Sodium, "Na".
    How about a joke about potassium, "K".


    _________________
    When life gives you lemons and you're allergic to Citrus, Swell up and die. - Dogbert, Great 21st century philosopher.
    avatar
    Tolvo
    Town Crier
    Town Crier

    Posts : 13287
    Reputation : 542
    Join date : 2012-02-01
    Age : 25
    Location : The Forest, Illinois

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Tolvo on Fri Apr 13, 2012 10:13 am

    "Wait a second, you're a Necromancer? Like, you can raise dead bodies and make them do your bidding? That's awesome!"

    "No no, you misheard me. I said NecRomancer, kind of like a Necrophile but we treat the bodies to dinner first."
    avatar
    Uparkaam
    Hollowed
    Hollowed

    Posts : 1668
    Reputation : 45
    Join date : 2012-01-18

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Uparkaam on Fri Apr 13, 2012 11:00 am

    What does a lamp-post and a football have in common?

    Neither of them is a wrench.


    _________________
    GFWL & PSN accounts:
    GFWL: Rusty Patches
    PSN accounts:
    Uparkaam (main account)
    Dorkmoon
    Torch_Hollow
    Ravelord_Servant
    Gastro_Zombie
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 1:37 pm

    Santa Claus

    Hey, um im chris cringle.I'm a sex addict
    Hey im Santa Claus, im the king of the snow, I hate my wife because she's a ho ho ho. She used to please me everyday till she made it clear, Santas only supposed to cum once a year. F**cking B***h.
    Now i buy whores, rock and roll and i stuff their stockings with my north pole...


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    TehInfamousAmos
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 5277
    Reputation : 118
    Join date : 2012-04-07
    Age : 24
    Location : The League of Draven.

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by TehInfamousAmos on Fri Apr 13, 2012 1:48 pm

    Tony the Tiger

    Im, uh hey im Tony the Tiger.
    Everyday I wake up I get to work late
    my boss says "Hey whats up" , I say "Im Grrrrrr-owing tired of this crap"
    the kids they laugh cause im a sensitive cat
    "Hey big *****" I cant argue with that.
    If another kid gives me frosted flakes
    I swear on my life I'll eat his parents.


    _________________
    ▶️̸̱◀️
    Requiem æternam. Dona eis, Domine Dum veneris judacare sæculum per ignum.

    For one slick avatar visit this thread
    http://soulswiki.forumsrpg.com/t8933-picture-request-thread
    avatar
    Uparkaam
    Hollowed
    Hollowed

    Posts : 1668
    Reputation : 45
    Join date : 2012-01-18

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Uparkaam on Fri Apr 13, 2012 2:39 pm

    Man walks into a bar shovel.


    _________________
    GFWL & PSN accounts:
    GFWL: Rusty Patches
    PSN accounts:
    Uparkaam (main account)
    Dorkmoon
    Torch_Hollow
    Ravelord_Servant
    Gastro_Zombie
    avatar
    skarekrow13
    Chat Moderator

    Posts : 10236
    Reputation : 410
    Join date : 2012-01-27
    Location : Ralph Wilson Stadium

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by skarekrow13 on Fri Apr 13, 2012 4:10 pm

    Oh yeah....

    My name used to end in "ski" until my wife spilled some polish remover

    avatar
    Darkson
    Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Posts : 1182
    Reputation : 18
    Join date : 2012-01-19
    Age : 24

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Darkson on Sat Apr 14, 2012 8:21 am

    Two high-rise buildings sit in the cellar knitting some gasoline. Who's the killer?

    No one - submarines don't have gills!

    hheheheehehee


    _________________
    What?
    avatar
    Reaperfan
    Compulsory Poster
    Compulsory Poster

    Posts : 3008
    Reputation : 135
    Join date : 2012-01-17
    Age : 26
    Location : Canterlot

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Reaperfan on Sat Apr 14, 2012 8:31 am

    Q: If you're rowing an organ upside down against a pillar of frozen silly worms, how many flapjacks will it take to cover a doghouse?

    A: Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.


    _________________

    "To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." ~C.S. Lewis
    avatar
    Digitalyzed
    Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Posts : 1136
    Reputation : 8
    Join date : 2012-04-02
    Age : 24

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Digitalyzed on Sat Apr 14, 2012 8:35 am

    Reaperfan wrote:Q: If you're rowing an organ upside down against a pillar of frozen silly worms, how many flapjacks will it take to cover a doghouse?

    A: Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.

    Spoiler:

    All of my what.


    _________________
    When life gives you lemons and you're allergic to Citrus, Swell up and die. - Dogbert, Great 21st century philosopher.
    avatar
    LordRevan
    Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Posts : 1076
    Reputation : 48
    Join date : 2012-01-19
    Location : Wandering...

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by LordRevan on Sat Apr 14, 2012 8:54 am

    Let's just take all these bad chemistry jokes and barium.



    _________________
    Xbox GT: DaDrunkDucky bounce

    avatar
    Digitalyzed
    Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Posts : 1136
    Reputation : 8
    Join date : 2012-04-02
    Age : 24

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Digitalyzed on Sat Apr 14, 2012 8:59 am

    LordRevan wrote:Let's just take all these bad chemistry jokes and barium.


    That reminds me of a good one.

    Why do scientists call helium, curium, and barium the medical elements?

    Because if you can't helium or curium, you barium!


    _________________
    When life gives you lemons and you're allergic to Citrus, Swell up and die. - Dogbert, Great 21st century philosopher.
    avatar
    Forum Pirate
    Chosen Undead
    Chosen Undead

    Posts : 6625
    Reputation : 232
    Join date : 2012-01-30
    Age : 26
    Location : International waters

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Forum Pirate on Sat Apr 14, 2012 9:17 am

    Micky and Miney mouse were in divorce court.

    The Judge looks over the papers and says
    "Micky, you say here you want the divorce because you say your wife is crazy?"
    Micky says, "I didn't say she was crazy, I said she was ****ing Goofy."


    _________________
    Your rules are yours
    My honor is mine.
    Perspective is everything.
    We are Exiles, and our home is Painted with the blood of trespassers.
    avatar
    Quarik
    Hollowed
    Hollowed

    Posts : 1755
    Reputation : 19
    Join date : 2012-03-26
    Location : New Mombasa

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Quarik on Tue Apr 17, 2012 7:54 pm

    Why is this topic not 50 pages long? Lame jokes are best jokes.


    _________________
    avatar
    Imarreteet23
    Caffeinated
    Caffeinated

    Posts : 837
    Reputation : 34
    Join date : 2012-03-16
    Age : 21
    Location : The Great Perhaps

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Imarreteet23 on Tue Apr 17, 2012 11:18 pm

    Why can't Hellen Keller drive?









    BECAUSE SHE'S DEAD!


    _________________
    There will usually be a time where I realise that my day simply cannot get any better, that the rest of the day will only get worse. This usually happens while playing Dark Souls


    Stay nerdy, my friends.
    avatar
    Imarreteet23
    Caffeinated
    Caffeinated

    Posts : 837
    Reputation : 34
    Join date : 2012-03-16
    Age : 21
    Location : The Great Perhaps

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Imarreteet23 on Tue Apr 17, 2012 11:20 pm

    And more chemistry jokes!

    So Argon walks into a bar, and the bartender said: "You're fat, ugly, and stupid."

    Argon dosen't react.


    _________________
    There will usually be a time where I realise that my day simply cannot get any better, that the rest of the day will only get worse. This usually happens while playing Dark Souls


    Stay nerdy, my friends.
    avatar
    Digitalyzed
    Insomniac
    Insomniac

    Posts : 1136
    Reputation : 8
    Join date : 2012-04-02
    Age : 24

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Digitalyzed on Wed Apr 18, 2012 3:42 am

    Here's a kind of Biology based one for you.

    Three pregnant women are sitting, knitting sweaters for their unborn children, in a waiting room in hospital, about to get their scans (Dont ask which one).

    The first woman of the three then pops out a pill, and swallows it. The other two go "What was that?", and she responds, "It's calcium, because I want my child to have strong bones".

    The second woman then pops out a pill and swallows it. The other two ask about this one, and she says "It's iron, as I want my baby to be big and strong" The other women nod and go back to knitting.

    Finally, the third woman swallows a pill, and the other two ask about it. The women replies "It's thalidomide, because I can't get the damn arms on this sweater to work".

    Badum dum tsch!


    _________________
    When life gives you lemons and you're allergic to Citrus, Swell up and die. - Dogbert, Great 21st century philosopher.

    Sponsored content

    Re: Thread of lame jokes.

    Post by Sponsored content


      Current date/time is Wed Oct 18, 2017 1:03 am