Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by PlasticandRage on Tue Mar 12, 2013 4:05 am

    Oh man. I've got a ton of good stories like that. I went home with a girl from a party one night, and we got up to her room, and it was kinda cold, so she asked me to close her window and I slammed all the fingers on both of my hands in it when I did, and not in the way you might think. Ya know how when a window is opened there's a space between the panes? Like say the bottom window is up there'll be a space behind it's top rim that goes down between it and the top window that's behind it? That's where I slammed my fingers. I tried to close it from the top, and used both hands, so when I slammed it my fingers got stuck in that tiny space in between the two rims. I shut it really fast, or it probably wouldn't have happened. I couldn't get them out, and it hurt like hell, so I started yelling for her to come over and open the window again so I could get my fingers out. It was very romantic.

    I'm just smooth like that ya know? You ever want a girl to just melt in your hands, slam your fingers in a window and then yell and scream, and jump around holding them going SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUU!!!! They love that.


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by User1 on Tue Mar 12, 2013 4:16 am

    I've done that more times then I can remember.
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by PlasticandRage on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:26 am

    It hurts so bad


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by KingSeekerCow on Tue Mar 12, 2013 2:30 pm

    This past weekend I was at the pub with some coworkers then I was spitting game at one of my coworkers. We got some where and then she all of a sudden came to realization we are coworkers. It was an awkward Monday work day. After that fiasco on Saturday Night, I was talking to this chick at the pub thinking my game was high, well I was super smashed and I couldn't make out what she was saying then I just left, leaving her high and dry. I did not speak to her for the rest of the night and then went home a few minutes later.

    Edit:: This is the most recent dumbest thing I have done.:
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by Zeta Prime on Tue Mar 12, 2013 5:34 pm

    All right.. so a few years ago me and a few buds were riding our bikes around doing just normal friend stuff trying to do wheelies and riding with no hands on the bars..stuff like that. I remember an idea possesed me.. i seriously have no idea whhat i was thinking. i may actually be borderline retarted. I decided that i would go really fast and then stick my right foot in the front wheel. I have never hit pavement so hard and fast in my life. I want to say that i learned something that day but thats probably not true as i lost an enourmus ammount of needed brain cells..and skin cells, and blood cells. needless tto say my friendss helped me up while laughfing at me. goddamn i have so many moments like this.. Im way to clumsy


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by Zeta Prime on Tue Mar 12, 2013 5:38 pm

    This topic has given me some pretty good laughs, awesome stories guys. keep em coming


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by Hatsune Miku on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:12 pm

    Other than shooting a nail through my finger. I've done something socially stupid, which was try to be goth. I'm glad I'm out of that.


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by WhatDoesThePendantDo? on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:19 pm

    That sounds hella painful. :affraid:

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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by Hatsune Miku on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:22 pm

    WhatDoesThePendantDo? wrote:That sounds hella painful. :affraid:
    The emotional pain from trying to be goth? Or the physical pain from the nail through the finger?


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by skarekrow13 on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:33 pm

    Honestly? Both. But the nail at least starts adrenaline going, numbing the pain.


    Spoiler:
    I was an early nineties metal guy..... goth precursor sorta so no judgment here winking

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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by Hatsune Miku on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:45 pm

    skarekrow13 wrote:But the nail at least starts adrenaline going, numbing the pain.


    Spoiler:
    I was an early nineties metal guy..... goth precursor sorta so no judgment here winking
    That's correct. But if it hit the bone I would have been in pain.
    Were you depressed? Because I was depressed trying to find my nitch.


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by skarekrow13 on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:59 pm

    I wouldn't say depressed but sure as hell wasn't happy go lucky either. Very aloof with most people. super shy. I think I had just enough positives to avoid depression. Basically I had a small niche, even if I was the only one there

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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by PlasticandRage on Wed Mar 27, 2013 6:40 pm

    So I just realized something that's pretty funny. I don't think the girl who works for my landlord will ever come back here again. She came over with someone to show the apartment today. Before she came I'd been making coffee, and while I was waiting I went to the bathroom to take a leak, and I heard the buzzer go off letting me know it was done just as I was finishing. No big deal, nothing out of the ordinary. So just after I pour myself a cup she comes knocking at the door and my dog starts freaking out, which she does sometimes when people knock. Being that she's a big pit, which some people are weary of, and that this particular girl has never been here, or met us before, I picked the dog up and held her over my shoulder with one hand and opened the door with the other, so the dog wouldn't charge out at them as soon as it was opened. So as soon as she comes in I'm thinking that she's looking at me a little weird, and I don't know what the deal is so I just go back to the couch, still holding the dog, and tell her to just do her thing. So she finishes up a few minutes later, still kinda looking at me funny, and then calls to me from the back door and tells me she's just going to go out that way, and I get up and come after her so I can lock the door behind her, and she shuts it real quick and takes off before I can, like she was trying to get away from me. So like an hour later, after 3 cups of coffee, I go back to the bathroom and realize that not only was my fly completely down, because I'd been distracted by the coffee buzzer, but I had pretty severe DOB on top of it. So when I answered the door I was like hugging the dog and my wang was hanging all the way out. No wonder she was trying to stay away from me. She probably thought I was some kinda weirdo, walking after her with my fly down and DOB acting like nothing was out of the ordinary


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by skarekrow13 on Wed Mar 27, 2013 6:49 pm

    I can assure that I am laughing at that. Awesome

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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by PlasticandRage on Wed Mar 27, 2013 6:50 pm

    Plus when I answered the door I'm sure I had my midsection thrust out because I was holding the dog and she's like 50 pounds, so I probably would have been leaning back a bit


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by User1 on Wed Mar 27, 2013 6:52 pm

    My god, that just sounds so embarrassing, I could never live that down.
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by PlasticandRage on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:01 pm

    Eh, another day, another person I've inadvertently shown my weener to


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by EeAyEss on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:03 pm

    That's hilarious. Might I ask what DOB stands for? I'm a very sheltered person.
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by WaLKA on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:16 pm

    I was in 6th grade I believe. Back in middle school I was a pretty good kid. I messed around a bit but never did anything to really get in trouble. One day though I was messing around with the payphone at the front of the school. A friend was with me. I said 'Hey, watch this!" and picked up the phone to dial 911. Now, I expected to go into a witty anecdote basically using the phone as a prop. But to my surprise and infinite wisdom, the payphone actually works when you dial 911 even if you don't put money in it. So I went wide eyed like a damn pug when I heard a voice on the other end.

    I slammed the phone down hard and started to walk away casually to make my escape. But, ohhh no, of course I get caught by a hall monitor. They grabbed me and asked what number I dialed. Off the top of my head I said my house, but they didn't buy it. Got dragged into the office and had to wait there until the police officer that was like...I dunno, a part of the school or whatever showed up. Meanwhile my friends were pointing and laughing at me behind the windows outside of the office. I flipped them off. And, aha, of course, the chick working at the desk lifted her head up at that one moment during the three minutes she was absorbed into the computer screen to see me and scold me.

    So after that whole bit, the officer showed up and took me to HER personal office. Now, like I said I rarely got in trouble back then. So I was borderline crying. But then I thought 'No. This is where it stops. No more crying like a sissy. it's time to man up." So I did. I didn't cry and just tried to act as calm as possible while talking to the officer. Apparently, I was not giving off a 'calm' vibe so much as a 'devil may care' attitude, so she believed that I was just some young punk as opposed to it just being an accident. Then, THEN, that witch from the office felt the need to call the officer at her office and inform her about me flipping off my friends. Icing on top of the cake. So she writes me off as a delinquent and I end up getting 72 hours of community service and wrote a 500 word essay on why you shouldn't crank call the police.


    Yeah, well. JOKES ON HER BECAUSE ALL OF THAT ESSAY WAS COPY PASTED.

    :x



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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by User1 on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:36 pm

    I did something I consider outrageous now. Bear in mind I was depressed at the time.

    I was doing my usual thing. Just talking with my girlfriend. At that point, we had been together for 1 year, more than most relationships lasted in the school I went to. Well, anyway, we decide to go do our thing behind the English block of the school.

    Mid-way through, this **** I knew called Kyle came out of the English Block. He started asking what we were doing, asking deliberately mocking questions. We stopped. He continued to say he would tell everyone about this.

    This is where I did something I think is outrageous. I go up to him. I was taller than him, and he was a bit scared, I could tell. I said, "Say that again, I dare you." He does, with some kind of smirk on his face. While he turns away, laughing, I grab his collar sharply, pulled him back, kicked him in the face, and dragged him to the low fence where we were near.

    I proceeded to throw him over the fence, onto the road where cars are currently going. He can't get back over. He begs me to help him over the fence. I grab him once again. I smash his face against the metal railing, and kick in his head while he is on the floor.

    My girlfriend had been watching silently the whole time. She looked at me with some kind of fear. I didn't like it, but it was to be expected. I was promptly reported to the headmaster, who gave me an exclusion for 2 months.

    I was a bit wierd all those years ago.
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by PlasticandRage on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:37 pm

    EeAyEss wrote:That's hilarious. Might I ask what DOB stands for? I'm a very sheltered person.

    DOB = D**k out of boxers


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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by User1 on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:42 pm

    Did anyone see what I posted on page 3? It got posted over about 10 seconds later. I found the moment cringeworthy.
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by EeAyEss on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:42 pm

    Ah. I see.


    Also, Cop, sounds like you went over the top, but the punk provoked you, so he got what was coming, and then some. Woulda been even better if you did Well What is it

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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by User1 on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:44 pm

    True. It would have been imposing, sure. But I might have wiped the blood on my boots on the floor.
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    Re: Dumbest stuff you've ever done (that's humorous in hindsight)

    Post by EeAyEss on Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:51 pm

    I've never really done anything seriously stupid. Well, maybe this.


    I, around the 4th-5th grade, was in a choir full of prepubescent boys , and there was this one kid who was good-natured, if not a bit ridiculous. He was awkward, and he constantly spouted "that was a knee-slapper." He wasn't all that popular, and I was a bit depressed as a 4th grader in public school because my teacher was a [insert derogatory term here] and I was depressed at the time. So I was kind of a prick and picked on him a little.

    Well, this one day, I decided to doodle some obscene stick figure drawing on the back of his memo, and he found out. Needless to say, he presented it to the Director after rehearsal, so I booked it out of there. I apologized the next rehearsal, and I was grounded at home for a while. No bad repercussions or anything.

    The kid didn't return the following year, and to this day I still feel bad. I wish I remembered his name so I could apologize. sad


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